You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Randomize
