I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Vodka?
Forever.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
