I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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