And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
