Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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