Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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