you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Randomize
