Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
