i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Randomize