im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize