You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
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Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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