i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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