escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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