That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
