I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
