we should wear snuggies to the strip club
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
