Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize