The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize