you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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