She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize