then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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