would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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