worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
