this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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