We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
