she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
