BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Randomize