Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
