Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
