We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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