So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
