u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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