They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
