I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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