Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
