Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
