is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
