my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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