We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
