I'm jealous of your bromance
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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