With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
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