I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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