right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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