I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
