white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Every concussion has its silver lining
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
