did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
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The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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