It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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