What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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