my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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