I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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