Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Randomize
